Hi there we are in a similar boat. I'm on 73-80k, two kids 6&4, single income. Live to your means for sure but we have a lovely big 5 bed house (well one is supposed to be a study), car, dog, don't live on the edge but not too frivolously either.
We we manage nicely and believe well be far better off than UK on only the one wage even!
afraid I don't know much about child are though.
jon